These two days, there is a hot news on Weibo, which makes Le Ma’s heart ache:
From September 29 to now, her family has taken her to the hospital many times, and dozens of small pieces of paper have been taken out of her eyes!
This makes the little girl’s mother very puzzled: why does a good child’s eyes come out of paper?
Under the comfort of her family, the little girl finally cried and said: there are two boys holding her daughter down, and another boy is responsible for putting paper in her daughter’s eyes.
Whose eyes can’t hold sand, let alone a dozen pieces of paper, big and small?!
Reporters have also found the principal, but the principal replied: seven or eight year old children have no malice, together is to play.
It’s hard to imagine that such words come from the mouth of an educator. Does the headmaster have any misunderstanding about such “playing”? Can you tolerate others putting paper in your eyes and playing with you?
Not to mention that the boy Gang’s behavior of stuffing paper has led to the serious damage of the little girl’s eyesight, and the huge psychological pressure generated in her later growth can only push her to the edge of danger at any time.
Now, at the age of seven or eight, a boy knows how to form a gang to poison a little girl. When they grow up, what else will they do that will be even more abominable? In addition, as the principal’s understatement of this campus bullying, we have to say that such education is really a failure
01
It is often said that hell is empty and demons are minors. In recent years, the campus bullying events exposed frequently make us feel more and more that this has never been an empty talk.
How terrible is campus violence? Le Ma once watched a public welfare program:
The staff asked 13 parents and their children to watch some real videos of bullying on campus.
In the 49th second, the children in the first group couldn’t watch. 1:16, the parents in the second group asked to quit; 3:05, the children in the fourth group cried to turn off the video
No one sticks to the end.
What’s more, these verbal and physical injuries are likely to leave them a lifetime of psychological trauma.
Almost all the bullied children felt helpless and even desperate.
This is an innocent age, but have done so cruel things. These boys are really unreasonable. It’s impossible that there is no malice. When the little girl’s eyes are stuffed with paper, she must have refused and struggled painfully.
But it’s very frightening to think about why the parents don’t know all about it from the beginning of school to now?
Because the little girl in “turbulence” never dare to say.
The threat of the perpetrator, for the young girl who is not yet physically and mentally mature, she is unable to judge and has no ability to choose the right solution.
It is difficult for a minor to deal with the violence calmly when the perpetrator grasps the fear in their heart and threatens with it.
When you are unarmed and helpless, you can only do what the perpetrator says.
Moreover, because bullying often occurs in the blind area of campus, and children in primary school are difficult to express clearly, or to communicate well with teachers and parents, this kind of bullying may be hidden and continue.
For children, parents are their most trustworthy people and should be their safe haven. However, some children who are bullied outside may get the following answers after they finally choose to tell their parents after struggling:
“Do you provoke others, or he will beat you instead of beating others?” if you provoke others again, you can’t let me save snacks. It’s normal for children to fight and make troubles. Why does he just slap you without slapping others
Then, every day, the students under the teacher’s nose make strange behavior, and the teacher’s reaction may be just like the principal’s when he knows it. I remember that Ma Dong once confessed his experience of being bullied in school in the story of wonderful flowers:
I haven’t been beaten, but (they) will take me to a mysterious corner of the brick stack, and then press my head and say: “say a cross talk.”. Who would think “say a paragraph of cross talk” is a bully? The teacher didn’t think either. When I told the office, the teacher in the office even shouted, “come on, say a paragraph first.”
Many parents and teachers often don’t know how to deal with the bullying when their children encounter campus bullying, and they don’t know what bad effects such bullying will have on the psychology of the bullied students. In fact, if parents or teachers fail to help their children cope with such incidents correctly, it will not help to improve their children’s situation, but will encourage more frequent and worse bullying.
02
Campus violence is never a case. It should not only be a hot news spot, but also a hot and cold one. But many times, we don’t even have the courage to face it.
I am used to the “official” of the Education Bureau, the “we have no responsibility” of the school, and my parents’ awakening.
Tragically, we are used to tragedy causing reflection, but if we don’t do something, these problems will never heal themselves.
When I see similar news, I often ask myself a few questions:
How to prevent their children from campus violence? What should we do in case of such problems?
The first idea of many parents may be to send their children to learn martial arts, taekwondo, karate, etc. to teach their children how to protect themselves. They can fight back when they are bullied by others.
But the more we find out, the more we will see, that force will not solve all problems. And the greater the risk of conflict that follows.
Therefore, parents must also make their own efforts to avoid children suffering from campus violence.
1. Don’t train children to be cowards
Campus violence is nothing more than bullying. They are more likely to find timid and cowardly people to be their bullying targets.
Parents should first make it clear that children can be introverted, calm and gentle, but never cowardly.
In fact, many children’s cowardice is inseparable from the internal factors of the family.
One is that the parents are too strong, the children are not valued, have no status and have no right to speak at home; the other is that the parents are used to scolding and criticizing the children; the third is that the children grow up with their grandparents, and their behaviors are subject to too many constraints and threats about danger; the fourth is that the family environment is poor, and the children lack a sense of security.
Responsible parents can completely avoid these situations in the process of children’s growth, so that children will not be timid and afraid of things, and will not be easily afraid and retreated because of other people’s threats and threats.
2. Establish trust relationship with children
Parents should treat their children as a good friend from the bottom of their hearts, and wait for them. If they change their hearts, they will know the same thing.
When you encounter something, please choose to trust your child unconditionally. Because for children, the grievance from their parents is more harmful than the bullying from their classmates.
When a child asks for help from his parents, his words may be inappropriate, but parents must choose to believe in their children unconditionally, and then go to find out what is going on, and then choose the opportunity to communicate with the child.
3. Know how to establish contact with school teachers and understand children in many aspects
Do we really know our children as parents? In fact, it’s not true. When parents are present or not, there will be great differences in children’s performance. We need to understand children’s performance in many ways.
When children grow up, they will gradually leave their families and start to enter the “society”, communicate with people and be influenced by the environment. In school, there will be different roles such as teachers, classmates and parents of classmates. We should take the initiative to understand what kind of differences our children will have in this environment, and we can’t think of doing this until everything becomes out of control.
03
Up to now, the pressure of public opinion has forced the local bureau of education and sports to make the following notification:
For such a solution, Le Ma doesn’t know if it is an “official declaration” again and again.
After arousing the anger of the society, we use some ideological and moral indoctrination to solve the problem. But children’s inner world, they can really do a little bit to make up and repair it?
Where there is light, there will be endless darkness. There is no end to campus violence, we still need to do our best to protect every child.
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