There are many mothers who have such worries:
Mingming’s baby had a good time at home, but when she saw her mother coming back, she refused to play by herself, so she had to stick to her mother.
Mother has something to go out, baby just like to experience life and death, resolutely refuse to let mother leave;
When something goes wrong, you start crying and screaming.
They do not understand why looking at a clever and sensible baby, as long as they are around, will become a “grinding goblin”?
In fact, there are reasons why babies don’t behave well in front of their mothers.
1. First of all, before the child is 3 years old, the most attached is the mother: October pregnancy, once delivery. The child has been drinking his mother’s milk and sleeping with his mother’s arm. In this world, he is most familiar with the taste of his mother. It takes a long and gradual process for a child to grow up to be an “independent” individual. In this process, do not push the child away brutally. Give him some time to let the child grow up slowly.
Actually, be happy.
2. Only in front of mother can we be unbridled. The American Parenting Encyclopedia points out that when a mother is not at home and a nanny or family member tells you that a child behaves like an angel, don’t secretly feel happy that the child has finally grown up. Children do not grow up, but they do not trust others enough to test their bottom line.
Children’s fear of being wild with others is a manifestation of their self-protection and maturity. Because they understand that they can be forgiven for not being reasonable and sloppy in front of their mothers, but they have no courage to face other people.
2. The grievances he hides in his heart need to be vented: we often have the experience that we suffered grievances in the company or other places, often only to “drop teeth and swallow them in”. When facing the close relatives, we need not hide them, and the grievances can be vented quickly. In fact, like adults, children also like to vent their discontent and grievances on the closest people.
3. Children also have separation anxiety
Nowadays, many mothers are able to hold up half the sky, which is not only to run the family, but also an important backbone of the company. The time spent with children is usually only a few hours a day. Without a mother for a long time, children are often uncertain: Where has my mother gone? Will she come back? Does she still love me?
Therefore, every time a mother wants to go out, the child will have “separation anxiety”, especially afraid that the mother will leave. In fact, this is just a way for children to seek attention in disguise.
In the final analysis, all kinds of unreasonable and unreasonable behaviors children show in front of their mothers are to show their true selves. For the mother, this is a “sweet burden”, because the child’s heart is still open to you!
So, how to deal with “bad” children?
First of all, give your children high quality companionship. Patty Whifler pointed out in “Listening to Children” that “Children like to express all their emotions at home in front of their close relatives because they can be listened to and understood. The more the child is understood, the better he will behave outside in the future. Listening to him, understanding him, accompanying him, perceiving his needs, thinking about the reasons behind, will be more conducive to the establishment of a harmonious parent-child relationship.
Secondly, before going out, give the children the time to quantify their return. The reason why children are afraid of their mothers going out is that they can not tell the difference between disappearance and departure, so they will appear restless and even panic. You can tell your child “Mom will be back in the afternoon when she goes to work” or even at which time, such as “After the baby takes a nap, the mother will be back” or “After the baby eats breakfast, the mother will be back”. Explain clearly and clearly, and the child will be full of expectations.
Finally, remember to be more patient. No matter how a child behaves, he should try to control his temper, listen to his needs gently and calmly, and give him enough sense of security.
Because it’s not many years since children stick to you.