A friend brought her daughter over a year old to play, and the little one had a habit of throwing things. Whenever her little hand could reach something, she would grab it and throw it onto the ground, then happily “giggle” and keep laughing. Adults were busy rushing in front of her to protect fragile items. The little guy is innocent and innocent, there’s nothing wrong with him. However, at that moment, I thought: when I have a child, I must not let him be so capricious.
Image material sourced from Huagai
My son Lele is now 16 months old, and every time I take him out for a party, my friends always admire him. The aunt who took care of him also sincerely said, ‘Lele is really sensible.’. I am truly proud of him and relieved for myself, because my efforts as a father have yielded results.
1: Be patient with children
Only by becoming a parent can one understand how much patience is needed to treat children. When you carefully prepare a big meal, he doesn’t eat a bite; When you have a lot of things waiting for him to fall asleep before doing them, he refuses to sleep no matter what; When you are so drowsy at night, the little thing is crying endlessly… You have to desperately suppress your anger and treat your baby calmly. You must do this because upon closer examination, none of this is his fault. But can you do it? Can you do it time and time again? My strategy is to satisfy his reasonable demands to the maximum extent possible with patience. Children are actually the shadows of their parents, and how you approach them will subtly become a part of their personality. You definitely don’t want your child to become an impatient or even rough person. After all, human patience is limited, so I need to make him endure some patience and waiting, even if his demands are reasonable. For example, if I am doing something and he wants me to accompany him, I will tell him that I am busy and wait until I finish something before going to accompany him.
2: Every word must be acted upon
You may think that the child is young, it’s okay to deceive him occasionally. Actually, this is not good unless you hope to be deceived by him in the future. I don’t deceive children. I also deliberately wanted him to know: Dad won’t lie to him, he does what he says. This is very important, on the one hand, it can gain his trust; On the other hand, it can also establish the authority of my father’s words and actions, avoiding him from making trouble out of luck. For example, when I first dressed Lele and asked him to put down the things in his hand, he always cried and refused. Perhaps he thought I wanted to take this thing away. After getting dressed a few times, I immediately handed the things back to him, and from then on, he confidently put them down or voluntarily handed them over to me.
Try to be consistent and avoid causing confusion in children’s thinking and judgment. Dealing with the same event requires setting the same standards. If you allow your child to do so today and tell them not to do so without any reason tomorrow, it will cause chaos. You may forget your inconsistency, but children will never forget it. Over time, you will find it difficult to implement your commands. Is it a child who is capricious? Actually, part of it was caused by you.
4: Don’t impose your own will on children
Every child has their own joys and sorrows, and even parents have no right to demand that they do everything according to your wishes, even if you are doing it for their own good. For example, if you think he should go to bed, you must make him eat all the rice in his bowl, or you must make him put down the toy in his hand and do what you want him to do… The imposed result can only be counterproductive. Allowing children to act according to their own wishes not only helps them be happy and optimistic, but also cultivates an independent and independent personality.